Can you say amazing? Oh where to start for this one. I left my cell phone at home because first off there was no reception and second off I didn't even want to look at it. I'm so happy I did that. So, I arrived at church around 3 10ish. Put my stuff on the bus and signed in. Jayar and I sat together of course hahaha. Ashton and Taylor were behind us. The ride there we watched click and then all of us fell asleep during it. Woke up and we were at Barstow. Jayar, Lynne, Ada, and I ate at Panda. Waisted food dangit haha. So we had this thing called the "Holy Hammer" where you had to hold it for 20 minutes and put our initials on it. I had it the last 20 minutes before we got off to Barstow. Me and Jayar initialed it on the bottom where no one else could. GET EM ! So we going up the mountain and it's all dark. Narrow roads. SCURRY ! And then taylor said curtains hella funny hahaha. I couldn't stop making fun of his ass. Then Jacob's ass.. " I can play that acapulco! "... I look at Taylor all confused and what not. And I just start hella laughing hahahha. Jayar's ass started hella laughing at me cause I couldn't stop! Haha. Oh geeezez. He meant to say acapella. HAHA. Anywhoo. We arrive at Alpine and it's fuckin freezing! Haha. We go in this room and just start talkin. We play all this quick games. THen we get situated in our rooms. It was like 12 or 1 when we got in. I loved my roomies hahaha. So fun. We didn't sleep till like 3. We had to wake up at 7! Weak ! But we just kept laughing and doing random shit. So then we fall asleeeeeep.
We wake up at aroudn 7 and have breakfast at 8. Breakfast was good. Half asleep eating and what not haha. We go into the lounge again and get in our colored groups where we did many activities again. Like how do you show your faith, singing songs together, laughing hella hard, haha. We did aan activity where we got a nail and a mustard seed. We had no idea why but we were told to keep them with us and to not lose it! We was PURPLE GROUP ! YAY ! We bomb yeah. Played jeopardy. 2nd place whatever ! But yee! haha. We ate lunch and then we went up to the ropes course! SHOOOZ Can you say fun?! But before the ropes course we did this lil activity where we were both standin on these benches where it was split in the middle and we all had to switch sides. But I had a blindfold on and two people had their hands tied together so it was challenge. They had to guide me and tell me which way to turn put my foot where etc. It was such a challenge. I trusted all of them. Trust was a major issue and I gave them all my TRUST. They all held me and promised not to let me go. A lot of them were bigger than me so they just swung me around haha. I was gripping on for dear life to them haha. Well there was another blind guy too, and he fell crossing the gap. Of course all of us were upset cuz if that happened, we had to start over ! So we gave GRACE. Such a beautiful word. Grace is when you give someone a second chance even when they don't deserve it. GOD gives each and everyone of us Grace. Thank goodness for that word. So we finished our task! We were all so proud ! THen we all head up to the ropes course ! OH MY GEE ! Climbing trees and doing all these challenges !!!! I did this one where you gotta climb a tree and walk across this thing wire grabbing ropes that are more than my arm length apart. Omgah was I scared ! But my guy doing my ropes kept encouraging me ! He was a cutie one too! HAHA. But I was shitting bricks up there cause I'm kind of scared of heights! So I reached for the first rope, and that was basically my arm length! So then I grab my rope to pull myself to that other rope! Then the next ropes were all so damn far apart ! But long story short ! I finished the challenge ! I felt so good! All the encouragement he gave me made me do it ! And my friends screaming for me that I can do it got me to finish ! Dang though my hands hurt so bad! I couldn't even move them cuz how tight I was gribbing the ropes and how cold it was out there. After ropes course we had a break. Then dinner. Yummy dinner. Talked ate yada yada. Then we had like an hour break. We went to the rooms and all hung out. Took crazy pictures. Walked randomly places. Haha. So much fun ! We all got hyper ! Then our hour was OVER. WEAK ! But! it was then 10pmish and we all went into the lounge. No lights on. Just a big cross in the middle with candles all over it and crosses. The room looked beautiful. They gave us a question to think about which was, " People would know me better if they knew that...." and we just thought about that question. One of the leaders Tiffany shared her story. Emotional, made me cry because my story could relate to hers. Robyn also shared hers, intense too. Then, all of us got a yellow envelope with letters in it. We didn't know what it was. So we opened it, and it was letters from our family and sponsors. WOW.... reading those letters made me cry so hard. I completely lost it. So touching...I just thought about EVERYTHING going on in my life at that moment. Hearing everyone cry around me was so emotional. After that we each got a cross from the big cross. They said we could leave if we wanted, but could stay however long we wanted. So of course I stayed. Talked to people, comforted them. Zack comforted me. I opened up to him a lil problem of mine. He just knows exactly what to say to make me feel better. I appreciated it. I just sat there staring at the cross remembering everything in my life that impacted me. God has always been there for me. Even if I thought he wasn't. He is always accepting us no matter what sins we make. I love him so much. I thought about Reggie and started crying again. I couldn't even see. I wrote a prayer for him on the cross. So it will always be there. I love you baby. I went up to my room and started talkin to the girlies. Crazy girls. haha. BUt yeah that was our 2nd day !
So we wake up around 73o and ate yummy breakfast at 8 again. We had mass after that and had all of our individual crosses blessed. I was sleepy though from all the crying I was doing the following night before. After mass we had a lil break. Then we came back in the lounge. We were told to sit in a circle with our crosses out. We were also told to take our nails out also. So then we were told that we had to go up to someone who had affected you during this retreat. We had to go up to them and tell them why, and have them hold our cross while we nail our nail into our cross with the holy hammer. So yeah, all of it came together. Everyone got up to get their crosses nailed and it was a very touching moment. Seeing everybody smile. It was a beautiful thing. Then after that we had lunch. After lunch it was time to pack ! Haha we were just enjoying our last moments in Alpine and just laughing going crazy. Taylor ended up ditchin Ashton ahahaha. So damn funny. So we all sat on the bus together our lil groupie and were just enjoying the motion sickness going down the mountain while lookin at the breath taking view. Haha. I fell asleep like half an hour into the ride and woke up with ppl yelling at me that we was at Barstow already ha. Ashton, Jayar, and I went to the mall and the gas station. We stocked up on junk food shit hahahaa. Ashton bought a carne asada burrito and stank up the bus ha. Then I fell asleep and before you know it, back in Las Vegas BOO ! hahaha.
Anyways, this retreat completely changed my life. I have been reading my bible they gave us and it's so easy to understand. This retreat got me reflecting on my life and the past and taught me to just forget about the past. This is my life now. Whatever happens happen. It taught me to be a good person to everyone. Help out wherever whenever. Be the first to strike! I volunteered to help out for the hospital and to teach confirmation 1 or 2 next year. I'm going to join the Youth Ministry After Confirmation group as soon as battlefest vegas is over. I want to stay involved in the church and help as much as possible. Church makes me feel whole and warm. Makes me feel loved. Everyone is open and welcomes you. I love it! I feel like my soul has been purified and touched. It's such an amazing feeling. Like I have been cleansed. I'm going to start praying every night because I know God will be the one to listen to me and will be the one who is always there for me. No matter what God will never hurt me or betray me. He will always forgive me and give me grace. I love him very much. I thank him for always being there for me even though I didn't know he was. My set of footprints have been a single set for a long time, I think pretty soon there will be two sets of footprints.